Monday, December 19, 2011

The Door at the Back of Beyond


The thread so far is just at the point of sitting with both Absence and the Possibility of Presence at the same time. It's not the easiest of things to do. But like so much else in life, learning to recognize our moments, to read the signs, to follow the star becomes more familiar in the doing. 

But after a long plod sometimes things happen all at once.

Lucy was just playing hide and seek when she climbed into the wardrobe, edging back behind its old coats so she wouldn't be found. Back and back and back until she discovered there was no back--and something was crunching under her feet--it was snowing! She was in Narnia.

Moses, having run away from Egypt to save his life, was tending his father-in-law's goats so far from the familiar that it was called The Back of Beyond. This is where Moses saw the great sight--a bush that burned but didn't burn up. 

Four years after my friend gave me the gift of being lost, I was again sitting and reading one morning (I had become so curious and open to where the thread I was following might take me that I was actually reading the Bible--pretty much the last place I thought wisdom might be found.) One of the 'wise people' I'd been reading quoted Jesus here and there. He obviously had been experiencing Jesus as  a particularly rich source of wisdom. Go figure. 

So I had plodded through the first 10 chapters of Luke. Same old same old.

Then in chapter 11, I saw it, I got there--the back of the wardrobe, the back of beyond. Here's what I was reading, Jesus was saying:

Ask, and it will be given to you; search, and you will find; knock, and the door will be opened for you. For everyone who asks receives, and everyone who searches finds, and for everyone who knocks, the door will be opened. Is there anyone among you who, if your child asks for a fish, will give a snake instead of a fish? Or if the child asks for an egg, will give a scorpion?

I wasn't 19 anymore. I was 23. Some things I was beginning to see from both sides, at least a little. I had come to that point in time where a child can begin to see his/her parents in a fresh way. How hard most parents try. How hard it is to be a parent. How much most parents really care about their children. How much my parents cared about me. 

Here's what I read next, Jesus is still talking--

So, make the connection. You humans, being as fallible as you are (one thing my 4 years had taught me was how very fallible I was), know how to give good gifts to your children. Consider what God wants to give you.

Then, just like that, in a flash--Narnia, a flaming bush.

I jumped out of the chair. My heart was on fire. My brain was nearly exploding with wonder. I kept looking back at the chair. And the Bible. Who knew!

All I had done was to consider what God might want to give me. It came faster than Next Day Air.

Who knew?